If you or your child has just suffered a TBI and are looking for hope and guidance. Follow our journey as we navigate through this new life.
Day 1: The Worst Day Ever Imaginable
The phone rings. It’s my ex-husband and he’s calling me at 11:30 at night but hangs up, Startled, I thought it must have been by accident. A second later the phone rings again. I knew at that point something terrible has happened. On the other end of the line, I hear panic. “Be ready I’m picking you up. Evan has been in a horrible accident, and he is being airlifted to Albany Med.” My first response to him, ” Please tell me he is still alive.” The other end is silent for a minute which sends pure terror through my body. Finally, “I don’t know”, This is the beginning of our journey. A journey that has devastated our entire family.
My son was hit head on by an underage drunk driver. He was racing his friends, also drunk, on a state highway. Each car taking turns passing another. The man who hit my son decided to pass on a double yellow line coming around a blind corner. My son didn’t have time to react. He was hit at an astronomical high rate of speed. An odd thing to say but a miracle occurred as Evan should have been killed instantly. The drunk driver of course only suffered superficial injuries.
The ride to Albany Med was excruciating as it is almost an hour away and we had to pick up younger son along the way. My ex-husband was driving as fast as he could and when we arrived it was my worst nightmare come true. We entered the emergency department where my ex-brother-in-law met us. He lived closer and we wanted someone there as soon as possible for Evan. Evan arrived at Albany Med at the same time we did. As I stood in the very busy ER my head was dizzy, no one could answer our questions. Then a chaplain approaches us, and I screamed He’s dead. She comforted me that she didn’t know the status of our son but just wanted to bring us some comfort. Comfort? There is no comfort to be given. My child, my 23-year-old boy, my rainbow baby, possibly gone from me forever. How can one be comforted? Finally, a security guard approaches us and explains Evan has been moved directly to the SICU. He was to escorts us to that waiting area. We are told to just sit and the doctors with Evan will be out to talk with us. Hours tick by, no one comes out.
Finally at three o’clock in the morning, a team of neurosurgeons and neurologists come into the waiting room. There must have been 6 doctors all looking at us with sympathy. They tick through Evan’s injuries: a broken femur, both hands broken and his right hand degloved, bruised lungs, a shattered face, fractured skull and the worst injury a diffuse axonal traumatic brain injury. They are trying to explain the brain injury and my head is just spinning. How can this be happening to my child.
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